When a Client Has Nothing to Talk About

The Early Days

Note: Details in this vignette have been changed and blended from multiple experiences to protect confidentiality. What follows is not a description of one person, but a composite of common therapy moments that highlight what many of us encounter in practice.

I remember my first year of therapy so vividly. The faces of those early clients will stay with me forever. Their confusion, hopelessness, and vulnerability are etched into my memory. My own emotions are equally clear: the fear of failing them, the pressure to have the “right” intervention, and the desperation to prove my worth as a new clinician.

Many of my sessions followed a similar pattern. A client would sit down, weighed down by heavy emotions, and tell me they had nothing to talk about. When I asked for updates, the responses were short and flat: “I don’t know. Just work and stuff.” Nothing to work from.

I came prepared. I researched interventions. I brought mindfulness exercises, but they dismissed breathing practices as unhelpful. I introduced values work, but they brushed it aside: “I have already thought about that.” Their stated goal was to find hope in a world that felt abandoned and aimless, but the sessions gave me nothing to anchor onto.

A Turning Point

One day, instead of pulling out another intervention, I decided to name what I was noticing in the moment. I told them: “I see you coming back each week, even though you say nothing is helping. I notice that when I offer ideas, you often shut them down.”

Then I asked: “How does it feel for you when that happens here, between us?”

And then, I stopped. I did not try to fill the silence. I let the space breathe, even though it felt like hours.

Eventually, something shifted. Irritation surfaced, then sadness, then grief. Tears followed. And through that moment of silence and raw emotion, clarity began to emerge about where they wanted to go and what really mattered.

Lessons for Therapists

1. Name What Is Present
Sometimes the most powerful thing we can do is call out what is happening right there in the room. Reflecting the pattern such as “I notice you are shutting down my suggestions” can bring the invisible dynamic into awareness and create movement.

2. Allow the Silence
Silence is not failure. It is often the space where truth emerges. Our discomfort as therapists can push us to rush in, but sometimes sitting with silence communicates trust and creates room for the client’s experience to unfold.

3. Match Effort to Motivation
We are often told “Do not work harder than the client.” I will admit that I resisted this advice early in my career. Working hard felt like control, like proof of my commitment. Over time, I have learned that real change happens when my effort aligns with the client’s readiness, not when I outpace it.

4. Flex Between Guiding and Following
Some clients need more direction such as a grounding exercise, a structured prompt, or a concrete tool to engage them. Others need space to sit with what is happening in the here and now. The art of therapy lies in knowing when to lean into structure and when to loosen it.

Finding Your Style

Every therapist eventually develops their own style. For some, structure is a steady compass. For others, flexibility and presence guide the work. Both approaches have value, and what matters most is attunement: knowing when to step forward with guidance and when to step back and trust the process.

What I have discovered is that even in sessions where a client says they have “nothing to talk about,” there is always something in the room. The blank spaces are not empty. They are full of possibility. When we can slow down, name what is present, and tolerate our own discomfort, those “nothing” sessions often become the ones that matter most.

Bringing It Into Practice

If you have ever sat across from a client and felt the weight of silence, you know how unnerving it can be. You may find yourself thinking: Should I structure this session more tightly? Should I trust the silence? Should I redirect with a tool?

The truth is that there is not one right answer. What matters is your awareness of the process, your ability to experiment, and your willingness to bring yourself back to the here and now. Some days, that looks like offering a scaling question or guiding a DBT skill. Other days, it means letting the silence speak until the client finds their own words.

That balance between guiding and relying on the client is a muscle we all build. It is what makes our work both humbling and endlessly creative.

Invitation

In my upcoming Therapist Toolbox Course 3, we will dive into these very challenges: how to respond when a client has “nothing to talk about,” how to weave in Solution-Focused prompts, and how to integrate DBT tools in real time without forcing them.

We will also practice what it looks like to balance structure and flexibility, so you leave with strategies that fit your unique style as a clinician.

If these reflections resonate with you, I would love to have you join me live on Friday, October 15th at am.. You will leave with practical scripts, interventions you can use right away, and the reassurance that “nothing” sessions are not wasted. They can be turning points.